Mornin sickness

It's been a long time since I blogged. No time n lazy sometimes.
Erm. I am working now alot of things to do but someone alot of things is going through my head and heart, need to jot it down.

Mmm.. prolly abit update on myself.
Been busy with 169 Project, I am happy things are picking up and I am moving on although things are
abit tough in the beginning.

Had my apprasial tat day. Talk to Chris for darn long.appr 3 hrs. Everyone ask me how was it. somehow i dunno wad to say. I was pretty excited abt wad Chris says. But some pple dash my hopes and actually currently i dunno what to expect.

What I was happy about opportunities. Chris gave me the opportunity to learn, relearn and learn more.
Perhaps thats the reason sometimes I cant click with certain pple . Maturity and perspective issues. I guess. Not that I am very good but just we have different mindset due to backgrd and character I guess.

Ask me why I dun realli want to get into the Loud banging conversation they have in the office. Because sometimes I dun like to be in that atmosphere. One thing I really hate to come across is pple forming cliques.
Perhaps thats the reason why I prefer or pple see me as a "loner". Its not abt I dun wanna click I can and I do want. But i felt some topics or conversation I just dun want to be in it. Perhaps it wasnt my phrase. I would say the phrase and topic of my life is different.

Chris told me she will not allow politics in the office. I believe its unavoidable. But I think durin the different meetings with Chris, I learn alot abt her life. sometimes i do sympathize with her but I can say she is gd in asking qtns. The Art of Asking Questions.

I dunno. I felt tension in the air after the talk with Chris. PPle gave me the feeling that I have intruded into their lives, their privacy. AM I thinkin too much or being too sensitive. Its the actions that make me feel that way.
God, take away this persecution. Perhaps pple thinking that I am taking over marketin. or wad? No la. I am still doin design. or issit because after I open my mouth many things have to change. Den i mention about the cohesiveness in TDF. They told me they were very cohesive. Well, they din seem veri agreeable about me being inside. Well. maybe i guess its the beginning. WHATEVER I WOULD SAY. Maybe like wad Chris say, I need to build the relationship ba. Cos maybe they never realli communicate with me.

Yest E told me something. I duno what she is hinting. I hope she can be more direct. She contradicts herself.
I guess she prob dunno what she wants. I noe she is irritated. and she told me i duno chris, and she ask me to open my eyes and see. I dunno wad she driving at and she says that chris told her that she welcome her back anytime after her SIA. I dunno she make me think or maybe she trying to tell me i shld not trust Chris too much cos she keeps changing her mind or soemtiems she test the person. I dunno. perhaps to a certain extend.

Just sian now la. Whatever, I just do what i am supposed to do. Time will tell and time will tell I will stay or not.